PLUS SIZE POWER: HOW TO START A GREAT LOVE AFFAIR (WITH YOURSELF!)

We have always been chanting, “LOVE YOURSELF!” and the internet has an infinite supply of tips and tricks on how to do so. But sadly, for me, how I came into terms on loving myself fully was a journey rather than a quick fix. Here are my “steps” on how I got where I am today --- having myself as my own greatest lover.

#1 Know and accept that at the end of the day, the only person that you have is yourself --- and that is an actual good thing!

You can’t control other people. You can’t fully control the environment and reality (not unless you are Storm or Scarlet Witch of the Marvel Universe). However, what you have full control on is YOU. I have learned this the hard way and I must admit, I am glad I went through all of that.

And what’s wonderful is that DOWN or UP, MEDIOCRITY or IMPECCABILITY, INSPIRATION or DESPERATION you will never (and can never) really abandon yourself. You are stuck with you. Good or bad. Because you can’t really escape it.

But that’s the greatest part about it all. You have you. You are never alone. In fact, if you befriend and fall in love with yourself, you have with you a partner that is so loving, providing and caring --- you will be left wondering what have you been doing all your life!

#2 Recognize that you can actually provide yourself with everything!

Right now as we speak, you are providing yourself with oxygen automatically, your body is adapting to the weather, allowing you to live. You are feeding yourself information as you read every word and your heart, try as you might, is still producing blood all over your veins.

Amazing how even if you don’t know you are providing yourself with the basics to be alive. And that’s just internal!

Did you eat today? How about that? You’ve found food and had the capacity to feed yourself.

Did you buy something you needed today? How about that? You have found a way to get money to purchase something that you need deeply.

Did you walk from one place to another? Amazing is it not? Without thinking, you were able to fulfill your own need of transportation.

You are a great provider! Not only for others, but for yourself. You are naturally self-reliant and you may not even know it!

As I accepted this truth, I felt so full and whole that I have noticed how I am no longer driven to “want” things and found great happiness in what I have right now. I can walk around the mall and not be driven with “gotta have its” or “wish I have that’s”. My “should have bought” thoughts are also no longer a compelling voice.

Not only have I found myself with more savings, but now I am with more possessions that I actually care about. I have never felt more attracted to myself.

#3 Treat yourself like how you want your lover to treat you.

Treat yourself like how you want a lover to treat you. Find yourself sexy. Find yourself beautiful. Think yourself as amazing. Give yourself compliments. Celebrate your own success. Lavish yourself with gifts. Reward yourself. Work hard for the money you need to earn and live. So on and so forth.

If you were your own lover, what would your lover do to you? Things like that.

I personally like to take time out every day in the morning doing a small prayer and reciting a vow dedicating myself to self-love and to myself. I tell myself how beautiful, smart and intelligent I am and how good I am. This always perks my day up.

Cheers!

Erzullie is a fierce plus size fashion designer brand from the Philippines dedicated to serving the style of the empowered Erzulliesta. Shop online: www.erzullie.com

PLUS SIZE DATING: YOUR AMBITION? #HELOVESIT

Any man with direction appreciates a woman who has the same. Nothing is hotter than a woman who pursues her dream with great heat of love and passion.

So go get it girl. Chase your dreams and take your man with you, while you're at it. Because your ambition of making an empire? Trust me. #HELOVESIT

Cheers!


Erzullie is a fierce plus size fashion designer brand from the Philippines dedicated to serving the style of the empowered Erzulliesta. Shop online: www.erzullie.com

PLUS SIZE DATING: 10 TYPES OF MEN THAT EVEYR SINGLE GIRL SHOULD BE RUNNING AWAY FROM (PART 2)

Whatever your trip is ladies, run for the hills when these flags are raised. You are worth your own peace of mind and heart. Here are 10 guys that EVERY SINGLE GIRL should runway away from.

READ PART I HERE

#6 The Explorer

The guy that secretly explores other “wonders of the Universe” (aka Women) while you guys are together and EXPLICITLY SAID “EXCLUSIVE”. Seriously. Be a Lara Croft and get out of the dangerous island.

#7 The Riddler

If he is the type of guy that gives you more questions about who he is, what he do and his intentions of you --- then maybe you should be asking the real question --- why am I doing this again? I mean seriously --- why? You got a lot of things to worry about and do. Like finding a guy that is just as open and legit as you are.

#8 The Ring Master

This is the type of guy that “makes you work for it”, and although Erzulliestas are never shy about effort and work, she should know that those two should be invested in something that is actually worth their while. Like the guy who will also put in enough “work” at the same time.

If this guy is making you “work for his affections” as if you don’t deserve them yet, while you are not requiring him the same thing then do a different kind of work --- like “far away from him” type of work.

#9 The Changer

NOTE: he liked what he saw that’s why he approached you. But once you let him in and he starts changing you into his liking --- then maybe take your time to think about it. Compromise is different from losing yourself.

And honestly, it’s odd. He liked you just the way you are and now he wants you to be the woman in his head? That’s kind of a dangerous road to travel.

#10 The I’m Only Looking

Trust me, Erzulliesta. An empowered woman like you deserves more than “just looking” but a full blown stare and devotion as much as you can give to your partner. So if the guy said that “he is just looking around” then look around as well. The guy that you deserve is out there --- looking for you too.

Cheers!

Erzullie is a fierce plus size fashion designer brand from the Philippines dedicated to serving the style of the empowered Erzulliesta. Shop online: www.erzullie.com

PLUS SIZE STYLE: TASK OF THE WEEK...

Need new style but no money? Borrow one from friend. Just make sure that you bring it back CLEAN just like how it was given to you.

Cheers!

Erzullie is a fierce plus size fashion designer brand from the Philippines dedicated to serving the style of the empowered Erzulliesta. Shop online: www.erzullie.com

PLUS SIZE POWER: PENDON NOT PENDING | LOVE, LIFE AND CAREER AT A FIERCE SPEED

Erzulliesta Tata Pendon bought her first Erzullie back in 2011. She applied for Iconship but alas, fate has it that it should be otherwise (it was closed already), but now after 5 years she is back, fiercer than ever! Life indeed does not wait for an Erzulliesta. Why? She makes it. Here she is discussing how she got the love, life and career she have always wanted in a fierce speed.

#1 Tell us your plus size journey. 

I have always been a large size compare to the kids my age before. I think it runs in the family - big bones, big structures. When I was in elementary and in high school, I was always in the last row or line because I’m tall and at the same time I’m big. I added more weight and became full blown plus size after I gave birth.

When I was younger, I was always frustrated because I cannot wear trendy clothes, those that looks good on skinny girls or small-framed women. But as I matured, I realized that it’s not just about the size, it’s about the person that you have become. With a positive perspective, you can always look good with yourself, plus size or not.

#2 Did being plus size hinder you in getting the career/love that you have right now? Why or why not? 

No. The company I am with reward people not based on their sizes, gender or ethnicity but base on their contribution to their respective team and to the organization as a whole.

I became a full blown plus size after I get married and gave birth. But I’m already a large size before, so I think, he has already considered that. And the way things are going on right now, we still have that same spark and intimacy as before.

#3 Describe your husband in three words. Why those? 

God-fearing: a person who recognises that there is One Divine Being greater than us and praises Him with all is heart.

Trustworthy: he is the kind that you can trust and depend on.

Respectful: he always has that attitude to respect people (most especially to his parents and my parents) because he believes that when you do that, you’ll get the same respect from other people.

#4 Do you think that being plus size hindered you in finding a meaningful relationship? Why or why not? 

I have always believed in, sizes, status in life or physical traits doesn’t make a relationship. Relationship is a two-way street where people cruising in it should know how to give and take.  Both parties should make an effort to make it work. Give praises when it’s due and call on actions that are inappropriate. Also, be each other’s shoulder to cry on or wall to lean on.

#5 Messages to other Erzulliestas with regards to relationships. 

Be yourself! Embrace your personality! At the end of the day, it’s not about your size; it’s about the kind of a person you have become. Do you keep your faith to your God? Do you honour your parents? Do you belittle people who are deprived mentally and materially? Do you consider yourself mighty over the others?

Cheers!

Erzullie is a fierce plus size fashion designer brand from the Philippines dedicated to serving the style of the empowered Erzulliesta. Shop online: www.erzullie.com