It has been a while since we have heard from Erzullie Icon and Plus Size Model, Audrey Lee. While away from the limelight, this Erzulliesta is busy making waves in the corporate world. Fierce and powerful --- she can get anything that she wants, if she wanted to. Now the question appears --- is having a relationship one of them? And if it is what kind?
#1 Let’s start with a hard question --- what do you think of single plus size women? Sad or Sexy?
I believe that it is sexy and empowering to be a single plus size woman. In my case, I always live my life to the fullest. I can just be myself and do everything that I want to do without consulting or asking permission from anyone.
Right now, I am happily single. But, of course, I am not dismissing the idea of a lifetime partner. I understand that there is time for everything. Right now, my time as a single woman has yet to end.
I am still learning many things about myself and myself within the society. I am savoring each moment that I am given as a single woman, because I know that there will also be a time for me to be with someone. When that time comes, I want to be ready. Ready means I have fully known myself and loved myself well enough to share myself with someone who is my equal. I want to be complete on my own. Because I believe that if I was incomplete trying to complete myself with someone, I will just drain that person.
#2 Are you now ready to open up to a new relationship? Why or why not?
I am not sure if I will be ready to be in a relationship. But maybe if there was that one person who showed willingness to grow with me in the relationship, I could probably say then that I am ready.
#3 Do you think there is a point in any woman’s life that she just has to be in one? What’s your experience?
No, of course not. There is no expiration date for love or relationships in general.
We live in a generation that is so used to having everything in an instant… not all can be instant. Relationships take time. Most women might be scared that they have an expiration date because of their capacity to give birth, but guess what? If God wills it, regardless of how old you are, WOMAN BELIEVE ME ITS GONNA HAPPEN!
Personally, there is no clear point in my life when I had that eureka moment that I knew I want or ready to be in a relationship. Right now, I know that I am capable of loving and sharing myself with someone who will love me and share with me their being. Maybe I will just get that eureka moment when I find that one person who was set aside for me by our maker.
#4 If you can create an ideal relationship, what would it be like?
For me, an ideal relationship would include God in the center of it. It will be very difficult to love, share and forgive without His grace and mercy every day. It would be nice to have quiet times together, to have a prayer partner and to have that person who will always be there to agree and be God’s voice of reason for you.
I would love to have someone who is spiritually stronger than I am. I would love to have someone smarter than I am but doesn’t make me feel like I am inferior. Physically, my peg has and always been the rock! Dwayne Johnson. Hahaha. He is tall. Muscled. I wouldn’t like anyone smaller or younger than I am. I would feel like I am taking care my younger brother like that. I want someone who looks very capable of protecting me.
I do not have a story board in my head. I could meet him at work as a co-worker or a friend of a friend. Anything really... but the key is to be able to connect with the person. To be able to talk with each other about anything and everything under the sun, and not feel any pressure or pretentions. To be able to feel like I have known the person for the longest time, but really I just met him a few minutes ago.
I would love to have an exclusive relationship. If you love, you need to love 100%... because you can’t love 100% it’s as if you don’t love at all. This means being able to give unconditional love.
#5 What’s the best kind of date you can think of?
Best date… Since for me the key is spending time and sharing experiences, I’d like to have a road trip. It doesn’t have to be luxurious or expensive. So long as you both are enjoying.
#6 Are you still into being courted/ “ligaw”? Why or why not?
I do not like the straight forward courtship. The moment a man tells me “I want to court you”, I will definitely hide or whatever. Courtship would usually entail having best foot forward and setting expectations. I want my relationship to come naturally. Grow out of fondness. I like gifts BUT when a man says he is courting me and starts sending gifts, I feel like he is trying to buy me.
For me, if the man loves spending time with me and makes an effort to plan travels with me that will be super awesome. Because it means he values the time we spend together, and wants to get to know me better.
If he clears up his schedule just to be with me. That is super kilig. Time is the most valuable thing you can ever give someone. You cannot buy or pay for it. When the moment had passed, it’s over – you can’t take it back. This is kilig because it means he wants to be memories with me.
#7 For example, a man is to approach you in public to introduce himself to you, with the intention of asking you out on a date --- how would you like it done? Why that?
In my experience, men who had done that to me were just plain creepy and awkward. If someone will ever qualify, I need him to be confident but not cocky. I need him to be upfront, but not rude. Definitely, not the creepy way. I have been approached many times and all the time it was just scary. I don’t know how smooth a man can be for this to work. But I can share how not to do it.
1. Do not approach me while I am texting in public. Say I am standing in a corner or shopping in a mall. Do not over encroach my personal space as if you can already read my message then ask for my number because I am beautiful. Creepy! Believe me this has happened.
2. Do not follow a woman while shopping lingerie and say “you’re beautiful and can I get your name?” that’s creepy!
3. When I say “no”, I really mean “NO” I am not like other women who means it “try harder”
#8 Finally, what makes you stay in a relationship? Why so?
As long as I feel loved, valued and needed, I will stay in a relationship because I don’t want to stay in one that doesn’t have it. There is no point in staying together if there is no love.
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Erzullie is a fierce plus size fashion designer brand from the Philippines dedicated to serving the style of the empowered Erzulliesta. Shop online: www.erzullie.com
